Swinging Voters

It's election day in Canada and I'm one of those swing voters that the media and politicians keep talking about.

All right, all right, stop rolling around on the floor. I know most of my friends and all of my enemies think I'm somewhere right of George W. Bush, but the fact is I vote Liberal or Conservative when the occasion suits me. My most recent Liberal vote was in the Ontario election. I voted for McGuinty because he was the "other guy," as opposed to butthead Conservative John Tory who had the election in the bag until he announced a faith-based schools program. Somewhere, there's failed Conservative candidates still throwing darts at his photograph.

Generally, I vote for the issues first and the candidate second. I'm willing to overlook minor "scandals" like smoking pot in college or other stuff from pre-political days. But the second I get suspicious that you might raise taxes, increase the size of government, nationalize almost anything, stifle my right to free speech, or otherwise be a pain in the ass, you're outta here.

I've never been a fan of the parliamentary system. The British gave it to us and we should have handed it back. It stinks.

I chuckle whenever Canadians freak out about the separation of church and state. So the guy says "God" once in a while. Who cares? That's nothing compared to the fact that the parliamentary system has no separation of legislative and executive authority.

The parliamentary system is tyranny in a prom dress. It's a system for cronies. Let's say I like the leader of the Conservative party, but the MP in my riding is a total jerk. The way it works in Canada, I have to vote for the jerk in order to elect their leader PM. I may get the PM I want, but now I have to listen to the jerk for the next four or five years.

My fondness of a republican system comes from a desire for the separation of the legislative and executive branches of government. This puts lots of names on the ballot. Voting for a "party" as opposed to a "person" has always smacked of totalitarianism. There's just something creepy about saying LIBERAL or CONSERVATIVE when asked, "Who do you want to speak for your county and country?" Why can't I pick a different person for each, no matter which party they belong to? It would be nice to pick a person that I like for representing the nation, as well as someone from my hometown that will keep them in check and not kiss their butt all day.

Australia tried to go the republican route a while back, but it flunked. I doubt Canada will ever try it. Canada is too used to nuzzling the hand-out teat. For many Canadians, "tyranny of the majority" is not something to be questioned, but enjoyed. When Canadians elect a majority government, they like the warm, fuzzy feeling that comes from passing laws with impunity.

Open debate? Vetoes? Legislators not completely in the hip pocket of their leader? What are these in a land where ABBA's "Gimme, Gimme, Gimme," could be a national anthem? Plus, let's face it: the Republican party in the US has so tainted the word "republican" for Canadians that most boneheads blanche when you say "republican system."

But one can dream.